Log 31 of the search for life meaning journey

Here is me overcoming procrastination and writing on two consecutive days in a row. Cheers to that!

These days, these subjects preoccupy my mind the most:

  1. Producing less trash and recycling for a sustainable future
  2. Traveling the world with Alex and Levi
  3. Meeting people that share my interests
  4. Helping causes I believe in
  5. Building a business besides my office job

In random order.

On travel:  A few of you might know that, about a year and a half ago we moved into a bigger apartment: a 4 rooms one. Unfortunately, that came with a price tag with a lot of zeros attached and the loan for it, together with the one for the car manages to erode our finances big time. We are not living a bad life, don’t get me wrong, but we are missing a lot of adventures and bonding time while traveling the world together that can’t be replaced with anything else.

We are considering (I came up with the idea and now we’re evaluating it) to move back to our 2 rooms apartment, sell this one and use the money (and lack of loans) to live our life, see the world while also saving up for our son’s studies and a fund for our old days.

It’s complicated actually. And each choice has it’s advantages and disadvantages.

On one hand, it’s good to have an apartment that will increase in value over time. And the extra space brings comfort, the area is good, there is parking space. On the other hand, these years of bonding with our son over adventures, seeing the world and opening our minds and hearts together in this process – will not come back. And staying at home together is not the same – I’ve seen it enough to know the huge difference.

And I think that either way we’ll choose, in the end, we’ll feel like we’ve missed on something. Now it’s just important to try and figure out which way the balance goes.

On parenting: Levi and I starting having actual conversations (like wow!). We talk about what he did at kindergarten, what I did at work, what he liked most about his day, what I liked most about mine, what each of us ate.

It’s quite fascinating to get a sneak peak into this side of his world he has when he’s away. And it’s fascinating to get a sneak peak into his thoughts and feelings.

 

 

 

 

Log 28 of the quest to finding meaning – Trip to Europe

Hi guys and gals,

Today I’m continuing the story on my trip to Europe:

Day 5: Ljubljana

We woke up and had a small breakfast in the Jewish neighborhood. Then headed to our next destination: Ljubljana. This was the longest drive so far: 4:18 minutes and we had terrible traffic which prolonged the journey even more.

I stayed with Levi in the back of the car and we played and red books and was amazed about how adaptive my little one was to all the tiredness this long drive brought. It also tested my own limits by having to entertain him for so much time with little resources without taking pause for myself.

But, I adapted, and it got easier after a while. Continue reading

Log 27 of the quest to finding meaning – Trip to Europe

Our trip to Europe has come to an end. I feel that I could travel like this indefinitely – it was nothing short of amazing. Not only because of the places we got to discover, but also because travelling bonds you as a family even more. And because it’s a nice way to live. 🙂

I wanted to log our adventures on a daily basis, but we ended up doing so many things every day that by the time Levi finally went to sleep, my mind was blank and just wanted to hit the pillow and do nothing else.

So now, that I’m back, I can finally resume my writing.

I will mark down here all the places I loved so I can keep a record for later.

We started our journey on August 15, on a Wednesday. Continue reading

Log 21 of the search for meaning quest

I woke up in a not very happy mood. Sad actually.

After one year and a half of paying the loan to the new apartment we have, I feel it was not a wise decision to do this move the first place. The benefits of being here are not worth it in my opinion, when compared to the things we could do, but are not doing to be able to support this expense.

Alex is of opinion that it’s OK to suffer a  bit (!) now and have later in life a place to rent and benefit from that money, like bonus on retirement fund. He has a valid point.

But I still have the same question coming over and over again: who is going to give us back the time that we are not using at it’s best right now, due to these limitations we self-impose? Continue reading

Log 18 of searching for meaning quest

As you may have noticed, between day 16 and 17 logs there was quite a pause.

It started by me saying one night: I am tired now, I will do this tomorrow. And the next day it was the same. The discipline that should have lasted me 365 days, took me only until day 16 this time around.

So I started to think: should I stop my experiment now? Should I continue anyway?

I felt I didn’t want to quit at this point. This reflection process is pretty interesting to me and rewarding. So I decided to do 365 logs anyway, even with this pause. See what I manage to learn about myself after all this time. Continue reading

Log 17 of the search for meaning quest

On meaning and parenting:  I had some interesting conversations with myself in the past days on the subject of parenting and relationship with children in general. This started while discussing with some friends at lunch over why people get married. Which, of course, led me then to think about parenting and how I relate to being a parent.
The one thing I understood step by step since becoming a parent myself is that my child does not belong to me. He belongs to himself. I am a teacher, a guide into how this world works and a source of love.

Continue reading